I identify myself as an “early-articulator” when it comes to my decision not to have children. Early on I knew I wasn’t put on this earth to be a mother.
My earliest memory of not wanting to be a mom was when I was 12 years old. Yes, I had baby dolls growing up, but my imaginary life consisted of me dropping the baby off at daycare because I was a doctor and had to get to work. When I would vocalize this presentiment, I was assured by most older female figures that I would “change my mind.” This left me confused because I was content with my mind not changing.
Motherhood was never particularly fascinating to me. I never had what one would call a “motherly instinct.” I am greatly aware of my limitations and moreover, I felt my life was destined for something beyond motherhood. I wasn’t remotely excited about the idea and I was more concerned with the resentment I’d have towards the child. I didn’t want to be filled with frustration for being forced to bring life into this world, knowing that it wasn’t something I wanted nor was suited for.
I accepted my unconventional life choices, despite the fact that other people hadn’t. I invite you to challenge society’s rules and live unapologetically. I have no regrets about making this decision as it has granted me freedom unknown to most. Solitude, sleeping in, travel, an impeccably clean house, and copious amounts of wine are just some of the perks of being childfree.
In my conversations with others, I have been completely transparent about my choice to be childfree, and I have met some incredible men and women that share my views. Instantly this bond of understanding and inclusivity is born. In February 2021 I self-published my book, The Parenthood Pendulum: Unadulterated Truths to Consider About the Path to Parenthood in hopes to change the narrative of what it is to be childfree and eradicate misconceptions placed upon the childless population by society.