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“Now I know that I just don’t want children for myself and don’t hate them in general.”
I grew up in Munich. School, job, partner, house, dog and children is the way your life should happen here – like in most places probably.
I always knew that I didn’t want children. Until the age of 15 I would always say, ‘I hate children and I’m never gonna have them’. But then I discovered YouTube channels, books and podcasts about being childfree and my mindset changed. I would still say that I don’t like to be around big groups of children and children who are poorly raised. But now I know that I just don’t want children for myself and don’t hate them in general.
I don’t want kids because I know how much they impact the relationship you are in, your financial situation, the environment, your time, sleep and basically your whole life. Luckily all my friends support me in my decision.
My parents didn’t really take me seriously when I told them that I am planning to get a sterilisation and an endometrial ablation. I’ve been told my them and by family and friends to wait one year or even until I’m 35 to do the sterilisation.
I still don’t understand where they get those numbers. I totally get that I am, at 19 years old, very young to make such a drastic decision and take the ability to bear children away from myself. But I have thought about it at least every week for the last four years, and even before that I always knew I didn’t want children. I’ve considered it enough to make a thought-through decision and now I am able to say with certainty that it’s the right decision for me personally.
Living childfree allows me to be my true self, to plan my day, week and year how I want it to be and to change those plans spontaneously. My advice for everybody who is struggling with the kids question: take the time to really think what YOU want and if a child would fit in your life plan, and spend time with children to figure out if they make you happy long-term.
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