“It means the world to now understand myself.”

Kathrin, 37, Germany

I am a neurodivergent women in her mid 30s and I never wanted to have children!

I live in Berlin an a small apartment. I like the freedom of going out on the weekend and dancing wildly on parties since I need a lot of stimulation. I always had this strange feeling of “of course I don’t want THAT (kids)” but I could’t fully explain why exactly, or why this feeling was so strong!

But by finding out that I am neurodivergent and getting diagnosed first with ADHD and later with Asperger’s syndrome I now know it would have just overwhelmed my neurodivergent brain, which needs routine and predictability. Also I get very irritated around young children since I am very sensitive to noise and a lot of movement around me. Previously, I never understood why I get so agitated around kids, but that’s why.

It means the world to now understand myself. I have always loved dancing, but with getting older, less and less people would join me for that, or they would even be like “but the party time is over, or do you want to be one of those who still go to clubs at 50 because they have nothing else valuable in their lives”. That hurts and I came to the conclusion, that if it makes me happy I can do it as long as I want! Especially because I have the time to do it :)

Your stories gave me so much confidence so I also want to share mine now and I hope it might help or resonate with someone.