WE ARE CHILDFREE

I was born in Cairo, Egypt and moved to Australia when I was 8.

I grew up in a reasonably conservative family and always thought I would be married with children when I grew up, just like everyone else.

However, my tweens and teens were a tumultuous period. My father was extremely critical and explosive and I was terrified of him. I would fight back but I was scolded for this, so I felt alone. It took me a long time and a lot of therapy to heal from the emotional and psychological toll of those family dynamics. I sometimes feel streaks of that rage my father had in me, and it absolutely terrifies me to imagine inflicting that pain on another human being. After working with children and listening to colleagues talk about their challenges with their children, I decided that it was not the right decision for me. After battling inner demons for so long, I finally have peace and I would not want to do anything to jeopardise that.

I like to think that the decision not to have children was a selfless one, so it is very hurtful when someone calls me ‘selfish’. The decision was made from knowing my own limits and sparing another human from the pain that comes with a parent who is not emotionally equipped to be a parent.

I am now happily married and spend my days working with people with disabilities and volunteering in environmental conservation. Although traditional holidays can feel quiet, I can confidently say I am happy and fulfilled with no regrets.