“It‘s my life and it‘s my only one.”
“I‘m not afraid that I am going to be lonely when I am old.”
I was raised in a Christian evangelical church. Believing in the Christian model of families I never questioned if I wanted children until I questioned the religion itself.
At that time I was about 30 years old and married for 5 years (of course he was the first man I
had sex with). When I met another man with whom I fell in love totally I decided to turn out the “box of my life“ and only put back the things that in my own experience are real and true and worthy.
I asked myself: “What can you know for sure? What is making you really happy?”
“You should marry“ and “You should have children“ are not in the box any more. If someone is stating these sentences I should ask: “Would I make you happy with this decision? Why?“ It‘s my life and it‘s my only one.
Without children I have more time and energy for my work with mentally ill people, my relationship, my friends and my grandmothers.
I‘m not afraid that I am going to be lonely when I am old. There are parents who are lonely and non-parents who are not. I live an interesting and independent life, I am a happy aunt and I want to stay in touch with younger people even when I‘m old.
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