“It can feel lonely, with friends just disappearing as soon as they built their family.”


I’ve never felt drawn to motherhood, but always looked forward to being an aunt. Then my sister moved abroad and I have no real relationship with my niece and nephews – it felt like the one way I longed to connect with children was torn away from me.

I work long hours in a fast-paced corporate job, and struggle to make friends, so those friends who do have kids don’t see me as a viable part of their children’s lives or as a babysitter. Having virtually no interaction with children does make me sad as I know they can give so much.

My husband and I have been together for 11 years, and I’m quite a lot younger than him. He feels the same way, but the pressure from both our mothers – particularly with my parents’ grandkids not being in the UK – doesn’t seem to ever stop.

Don’t get me wrong, I absolutely love my life. We have successful careers, a beautiful house, a cat who adores us, and we have absolute freedom which has led to amazing travels and experiences. I definitely wouldn’t change it. But it can feel lonely, with those friends who were close just disappearing as soon as they built their own form of family.

Connecting with the childfree community online is definitely reassuring that I’m not out of the ordinary, and my life choices are valid.