I’ve always been kind of childfree. I was always adamant about not having kids – even at 10 years old I’d firmly, in the most child-like manner, say “Ew, I’M NOT having kids!”. My childfreeness, however, has changed and evolved with age.
At first, I just didn’t really like kids. Later, in my teen years, I realized that sexism is quite inherently tied to motherhood. I concluded that I specifically don’t want to be a mother, nor do I want to be the “fixer”. Life is meant to be enjoyed!
After that, I realized that birth injuries are a very real thing. Giving birth takes a serious toll on the body and women are expected to more or less accept and live with it. I’m not willing to go through that. Other things became apparent with time, such as the economics of parenting; of being a family. To me, being a parent entails giving up on a lot of joyful things. I want those joyful things.
And just a few months ago, I got my ADHD diagnosis. It became the most recent piece in my childfreeness. Honestly, it explains a lot of my earlier feelings. All those earlier pieces, and my ADHD, have resulted in my current feelings about being childfree. I just don’t want a family life! No family vacations, no sleep deprivation, no fussing about food, no after-school activities, no kids yelling, no kids crying. And NO additional sexism, no birth injuries I’m expected to accept!
So, I’ve always been childfree, but the childfree journey has not ended because of it. Instead, I’ve grown with it.