“I just cannot see myself becoming responsible enough to take care of a human life form.”


Currently on my childfree journey, I am 34-years-old. I recently accomplished graduating with my Associate’s degree in Criminal Justice, and currently hold a lieutenant position in corrections.

I am childfree by choice. I have recently in the past few months gone back and forth in my mind about having children. My husband is a fabulous man and he would certainly take care of children; he has with his previous three. I just cannot see myself become responsible enough to take care of a human life form. To force a creature into existence and into this horrible world.

I worry if I were to have children the effect on my body; I’ve always had weight gain issues. My entire family is dead. I come from a bad genetic line. My parents were both grossly overweight. At my father’s death, he was 535 lbs. My mother died suddenly in her bed; complications from breathing and years of weight gain. She was strong enough to lose weight to get below 300 lbs. My brother died from suicide.

What is the point of bringing in a new life form by choice when one knows they have mental health issues? When one knows their financial circumstances cannot protect a new life? I am an active alcoholic with no plans of changing it.

I am stable in my current career. I do want to travel more with my husband, but I fear abandoning my fur babies (3 cats, 1 dog). Without children I am able to do whatever I want, whenever I want.