“Just think in what a situation we would have been if we had children.”


I was married to an alcoholic. I loved him so much, but it was hard. I did not want to bring a child into those circumstances, because I felt it wasn’t right. It was not fair towards a child to have an alcoholic parents. How do I explain why daddy is sleeping again… why he hasn’t gotten up today… why he isn’t at his/her school performance, again?

So I made the decision to not have children until he managed to turn himself around. He tried, but his sobriety didn’t last more than a couple of months at a time. Luckily he didn’t push me, so I guess it made things easier.

I’m 46 now and got married again a couple of months ago. We are both childless. I think we would be the best parents (and both of us wanted it at some stage of our lives), but we decided it is not fair for a child to have a parent that might not be alive when they get married.

We enjoy each other, enjoy life and enjoy not having any commitments keeping us from just jumping in the car to go away. Our money is ours and we are grateful for that, especially after Covid took my job from me. We managed to survive through those times and it was okay for me to take a job that pays way less than what I was earning. We could make it work between us. Just think in what a situation we would have been if we had children.