“Every person that I’ve met either looks at me as a sinner or a freak.”

Patrica, 40, Indonesia

Hai.. My name is Patrica and my marriage has reached 15 years when this story is written. We decided to be childfree in the second year of our marriage. At first, I never thought about being childfree, at the beginning of marriage we just decided to delay having kids because at that time our situation was not ideal to have one. But after everything gets better. We can say that we enjoy so much our freedom and also we are concerned about overpopulation issue, so we decided we’re gonna be childfree.

Is everything easy for us? Well, of course not. I am from Indonesia and the culture here is not familiar with the term childfree. They even can not understand what’s the point in being married but not having a child – by purpose. Every person that I’ve met either looks at me as a sinner or a freak.

In the first stage, I admit I was a little embarrassed to tell people that I have no children, in the second stage I was quite angry and defensive, in the third stage I often just lied to make them shut up. But now I’m at the stage where I answer with confidence, happy and proud. And now I live my life more relaxed, we now can learn and go deep into spirituality. And I can tell you, friends that used to mock us, now they start to understand, and are a little bit envious of our childfree life.

So yes.. we live our best childfree life now. Never regret.