“It‘s my life and it‘s my only one.”

Ruth, 42, Austria

I was raised in the Christian evangelical church. Believing in the Christian model of families I never questioned if I wanted children until I questioned the religion itself.

At that time I was about 30 years old and married since 5 years (of course he was the first man I had sex with). When I met another man with whom I fell totally in love I decided to turn around the “box of my life“ and only put back the things I my own experienced are real and true and worthy. I asked myself: What can you know for sure? What is making you really happy?

”You should marry“ and “you should have children“ are not in the box anymore. If someone is stating these sentences I should ask: “Would I make you happy with this decision? Why?“ It‘s my life and it‘s my only one.

I‘m not afraid that I am going to be lonely when I am old. There are parents who are lonely and non-parents who are not. I live an interesting and independent life, I am a happy aunt and I want to stay in touch with younger people even when I‘m old.