“We do not miss what we never had.”


We have been together since we were both 27. We are now 54. Feel free to do the math(s). We do not have children.

Luckily after many many years people have finally stopped encouraging us, asking us that question. They know now that we are clearly childfree… Though often from those that have children, “childless”.

Was it a firm decision from the start? Not exactly. But today we are both resoundingly thrilled that this is our life. We have lay in bed on Saturday mornings for years thankfully rejoicing in our childfree freedom.

We have 7 nieces and nephews and now 4 great nephews and 1 great niece. This doesn’t begin to count all the kids of friends in our lives. We do not miss what we never had.

I was never a fan of babies. Growing up I would say I had no intention of getting married and never imagined children. It was only when I realised my partner thought he would be a father that I allowed myself to consider having a baby.

I would do it for him. When I ask him now if he is disappointed it never happened he resoundingly says no. He explains, he thought he wanted kids because that what was expected.

We briefly looked into fertility options. After a few tests it looked difficult, so I abandoned it and declared if he really wanted kids, we could adopt. I also declared he would have to do all the investigation and legwork… I was never interested in kids, remember? Turns out he wasn’t really either.